Critique d’art

This is supposed to be art? Ky kid could paint that!

Bad Luck

"I'm going through a very bad luck streak lately. They lowered my salary. My car was stolen. My wife told me she wants a divorce. And today I bought a prepaid card for my cell phone, scratched it and got "better luck next time".

Poker

"Reason and experience indicate that one of the players holds the winning hand. You posit that I might not be that player, but it is equally true that I might be that player indeed, and if we stop and consider the attributes such a hand would ideally have..."

"Put your cards on the table already!"

"This is the last time ever we invite a theologian over to play."