Kardashev

Stature

Pure biology

Nut

Compliance with the law

Rocket

Star stuff

"Matter in Earth comes from stars that no longer exist."

"Really?"

Science confirms it
THE STONE OF THE PYRAMIDS COME FROM THE STARS

Wand

The limits of science

"Professor! You are playing God!"

"I will greatly multiply your sorrow and your conception; in pain you shall bring forth children."

Theoretical model

"Assuming that human beings are rational economic actors whose decisions are oriented towards maximizing their profit according to a clearly-defined self-interest, I have come to the conclusion that there is no sounder investment than a spherical cow farm."

Mad scientist

"I built this death ray on a shoestring budgets and with no help. But does anyone acknowledge my achievement? No! They only care I'm using it to take over the world. This anti-intellectualism is sickening."

Fire

"There was an electric failure close to some flammable materials. Not much was lost, but all our cancer cell cultures were destroyed."

FIRE CURES CANCER

Wine

Scientist claim newspapers will unthinkingly cover their work if it references wine in any way.

Use of stock images inevitable, the report finds.

Equation

"So, R* is the star formation rate, fp is the fraction of stars that have planets around them, ne is..."

Je n’en ai pas besoin

"Maybe you have no need of that hypothesis, monsieur Laplace... But we do!

In vivo

"Animal testing shows that this drug causes mutations. Therefore, its use is not advisable."

Cold

"It's so cold today! So much for that 'global warming' stuff, huh?"

"So much for that 'flying birds' stuff, huh?"

Confirmation

SCIENCE

Misquoted ten-year-old research supports our readers' biases

SHARE

Serum

"We have accidentally developed this serum that can turn anyone permanently heterosexual."

"Really? Can I see?"

"Of course, there's the matter of whether it's ethical to change someone's sex orientation."

"Er... Oh, yeah... Leave the ethics to us. We are experts."

"It's made with cells from aborted fetuses."

"Oh, Lord! Why must you put us through these tests?"

Contrary evidence

"I believe humans are rational creatures and will change their ideas if presented with scientific evidence that they are wrong."

"There studies say otherwise."

"Bah! Those studies are rubbish."