Anti-robbery

"The collections of this museum are impressive. And very valuable!"

"That's right! And we protect them with a very simple measure. This tube of homeopathic pills."

"This is a security measure?"

"And a very effective one! No museum protected by a tube of homeopathic pills has ever been robed."

"Hum... Are there many of those museums?"

"Oh, sure. Let's start shilling for Big Pharma."

Struggle

"You're poor because you don't try hard enough. Just look at me. I worked hard, I made sacrifices, I strived for what I wanted, and in the end I reached my goal of being born into a rich family."

Apology

"Now, let's not blow this out of proportion. After all, it wasn't my intention to drop a piano on your head when I let go of the rope. I apologize if you felt crushed by a piano."