Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Hero
"We are gathered here today to pay homage to Walter Maccaroni in remembrance of his valorous actions. In a gesture of supreme altruism and self-sacrifice, Maccaroni chose to confront the ghost of the murdered girl rather than endanger the lives of ten of his contacts."
Friday, November 25, 2011
Arm
MANIPULATOR ARM
"No! No! I'll be fine. There's no need for you to get premium lubricant oil. My actuators are in perfect working ord— Ouch! No, it was nothing. Don't worry..."
Tuesday, November 22, 2011
Friday, November 18, 2011
Overtime
"Good night, Gutiérrez. And don't feel down because you have to work late! it will help you climb the corporate ladder. I'm sure you have ambitions, don't you?"
"Of course! My biggest ambition is to have a life outside work."
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
Final exam
"This test decides whether you get your degree. You have come prepared, I expect."
"Of course!"
"For a long time I looked for someone who could pass the final exam of the alternative medicine career. No one gave me hope. But, when I was about to give up, along came Felix! I was amazed by his knowledge of the topic. He's just what I was trying to find!"
"You have passed!"
Friday, November 11, 2011
Prejudiced
"Prejudice? Our moral superiority is a matter of public record! No one who wasn't black, jew of homosexual has ever tried to have me jailed for assault!"
Tuesday, November 8, 2011
Sacrilegious art
"Yes, I realize I have offended Catholics with my painting Our Lady of the Winds. I apologize and vow to mend my ways. Consequently, I will make amends for this serious trespass in the way the Holy Church has taught me to. I'll take this to another diocese and put it on display there."
"Hey!"
Friday, November 4, 2011
Tuesday, November 1, 2011
Hamster Attack!
Do you own a hamster? They're cute, aren't they? What pet shop attendants won't tell you, however, is that no scientific study has shown that your hamster will never become...
A HALF-TON MONSTER THIRSTY FOR THE BLOOD OF YOUR CHILDREN
"Oh my God... I had never thought of that!"
Don't feel bad! With so many threats, it's hard to keep up! Luckily, this one can be easily averted!
Introducing
Qlospin5000
100% EFFECTIVE
Qlospin5000 is made with baryonic matter of natural origin and its wearer is guaranteed to be never attacked by a giant, hematophagous hamster!
"My family is safe and so I am! I'm a good parent now thanks to Qlospin5000."
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