Do you own a hamster? They're cute, aren't they? What pet shop attendants won't tell you, however, is that no scientific study has shown that your hamster will never become...
A HALF-TON MONSTER THIRSTY FOR THE BLOOD OF YOUR CHILDREN
"Oh my God... I had never thought of that!"
Don't feel bad! With so many threats, it's hard to keep up! Luckily, this one can be easily averted!
Introducing
Qlospin5000
100% EFFECTIVE
Qlospin5000 is made with baryonic matter of natural origin and its wearer is guaranteed to be never attacked by a giant, hematophagous hamster!
"My family is safe and so I am! I'm a good parent now thanks to Qlospin5000."
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