Critique d’art

This is supposed to be art? Ky kid could paint that!

Bad Luck

"I'm going through a very bad luck streak lately. They lowered my salary. My car was stolen. My wife told me she wants a divorce. And today I bought a prepaid card for my cell phone, scratched it and got "better luck next time".

Poker

"Reason and experience indicate that one of the players holds the winning hand. You posit that I might not be that player, but it is equally true that I might be that player indeed, and if we stop and consider the attributes such a hand would ideally have..."

"Put your cards on the table already!"

"This is the last time ever we invite a theologian over to play."

Contract

"About the clause stipulating that all the materials used have to be local..."

"That's not negotiable. We compromised enough already by commissioning a national monument to foreign contractors."

Dark Knight

Somewhere in Gotham City, the caped crusader wages his battle against lawlessness...

"Okay, okay, I've learned my lesson! I'll never infringe on your intellectual property again!"

Reading

TELEPORTATION TERMINALS

"Just one moment, darling. I want something to read during the trip."

The Godfather

"I honored my family all my life, and always praised You! Please, Lord, don't damn me to Hell!"

"Nothing personal, Vito. It's just business."

Truth in Advertisement

Great jokes sent to your cell phone. SMS the word JOKE and make your friends laugh!

"He did it! Ha ha! The moron did send the word!"

"He'll be paying for old lame jokes! Ha ha ha!"

I Don't Want To Believe

"The evidence is there for everyone to see: photographs, witnesses, messages in the crops... How longer will our governments deny the obvious reality of alien visits? Why are they so afraid? What are they trying to hide?"

"The president is now shaking what, for lack of a better word, we'll call the 'hand' of the being. Ladies and gentlemen, we're witnessing a historical event: Humanity's first contact with..."

"Once again, our leaders seem to think we are idiots. Who could ever believe that advanced beings would travel countless light years just to see us poor primitives? What is the purpose of this farce? What are they trying to hide?"