Suspect

"The male was found in the suspicious circumstance of knowing his own rights, and was therefore promptly taken into custody to be questiones about any felonies he might be involved in..."

Discrimination

BUREAU AGAINST DISCRIMINATION

"We want to present this report documenting how the word 'fascist' is consistently used as an insult in a fashion that denigrates us and stigmatizes us as a group."

"Yeah! We want every red, jew or immigrant who discriminates against us smashing rocks in jail!"

Emergency

"It's my fault! I should have taken better care of him!"

"It's nobody's fault. These things just happen. Look! Here he comes."

"MY BABY! What happened to you? Tell your mom!"

"The other kids... They dared me to make a rock so heavy I couldn't lift it myself."

"And he got a beautiful hernia."

"Don't you ever do that again! You almost scared me to death!"

Consolation

"You atheists have such a bleak, nihilistic message! How can you be so insensitive as to destroy people's and consolation in the face of death?"

"I'm sorry, madam. Your husband died in mortal sin and is burning in Hell now."

"NOOOOO!"