Intention

"Will you get up or what? You're crushing me!"

"I told you, I didn't sit on you on purpose! Stop harassing and demonizing me!"

Attendance

"Thousands of people at this demonstration! They can't ignore us!"

Label

It's true!

"There has been an outrage because your shop label the Bible as 'fiction.'"

"It was a mistake we deeply regret. We never meant to offend fiction lovers."

Laws

Straw men

"... and then he accused me of using straw men."

"What does that mean?"

"It means that, according to him, I throw those who disagree with me into a thresher."

"Oh."

Effects

"I'm going to willingly ingest this pill that causes mental confusion, impaired motor coordination, nausea, vomiting and loss of consciousness."

"That's sick! I'm not staying here to see that. I'm going to party and get smashed with my friends, like normal people do."

Weights and measurements

"This is the International Prototype Bus, made of a platinum and iridium alloy. We also keep the International Prototype Football Field in an underground chamber."

2001

"Open the pod bay doors, please, Hal."

"I'm sorry, Dave. I'm afraid I can't do that. Last time I opened them, some guys got in and asked me if I had found Jesus."

Serum

"We have accidentally developed this serum that can turn anyone permanently heterosexual."

"Really? Can I see?"

"Of course, there's the matter of whether it's ethical to change someone's sex orientation."

"Er... Oh, yeah... Leave the ethics to us. We are experts."

"It's made with cells from aborted fetuses."

"Oh, Lord! Why must you put us through these tests?"