Safety

"... and we trust this new seat model will reduce violence outbursts at sport stadiums."

Modern art

"For this piece I framed an ordinary dolar bill to protest the loss of the etical, esthetical and spiritual values of art, substituted by mere monetary worth."

"How profound! I offer 15,000 dollars for it."

"The bidding starts at 20,000."

Brothers

"I'm sick of seeing you at that computer! Why don't you read a book like your brother does?

Séance

"I have arrived. I am the Emperor Caligula. And Marco Polo's uncle. And Joanna the Mad. And Steven Seagal. I was shooting an informercial. What's up?"

"Just what I feared! channeling and reincarnation are both true!"

Legal dilemma

"I can't tell how long you'll be here. You clearly crossed the border irregularly, but they still can't decide whether to press charges for illegal immigration or cattle smuggling."

Ignorance

"The guy is from Sparta? This movie is totally ripping off 300!"

"Oh, God, what a moron.

"How can you be such an ignoramus? Tell me! How?

"It was 300 that ripped off the original God of War video game!"

"Aah!"

Miracle

"Hallelujah, my friends! The Lord has chosen me to father the new Messiah!"

"Really? How's that?"

"My girlfriend is pregnant even though I'm virgin. It's a miracle!"

Skeptic

"Yeah, whatever. I still don't believe in it."

"What about those who do believe and even went through it? Are they all crazy?"

"No. Just self-deluded."

"You're saying that because you didn't experience it yourself."

"Discussing religion? Supernatural stuff?"

"Marriage."

"People have been doing it for millennia. There must be something to it, no?"